Hello MAB readers, I will like to remain anonymous as I write
the story of my life. I am a pretty woman in her mid-thirties and I have 2 kids
for my husband. The problem however is that the last child I bore is not for my
husband.
Let me try and narrate my story so that you guys can understand
where I am coming from and going to. I started dating my husband back then in
school, he was in his final year when I gained admission into University of
Ibadan, Faculty of Science. He just took particular interest in me and helped
me all through my fresher’s days and he was a fantastic dude. We hung on for
the rest of the semester and on his graduation day in front of his mother and
siblings he proposed to me.
I was overwhelmed with emotion and in front of my peers that
all I could say was yes, not because I felt deep inside of me that I really
wanted to marry him but so that I won’t disgrace him in front of his mother and
siblings. We really never defined our relationship while he was in school so I was
baffled, angry and confused. Baffled because he knew deep inside that I probably
would have said no to him if he asked me out privately (we never even talked
about relationship while we were friends). Angry because he didn’t even carry
me along while planning the proposal thing and left me with no choice than to
say YES to the hoax; I am still angry with myself till today. Confused because I
kept thinking how a guy could PROPOSE to a lady he barely discussed amorously
with and hardly knew.
Anyways, that is past now and the rest is history as they
say but my fiancé left the shore of the country almost immediately for his
masters in the UK so that left hooked to a guy that is thousands of miles away.
We kept the relationship alive and one day he did something that shocked me. In
my 400 level, I finally decided to go to a party organized by friends and
colleagues since all my school days I kept myself away from socializing since
my fiancé didn’t like it. I knew he will ask me not to go so I didn’t tell him
about it but immediately I stepped inside my room, his call came in. he
narrated to me which party I went to and the dress I wore and that I was just
stepping in. I was scared! At first I thought he was a spirit following me
everywhere but then I realized later that he must have been spying on me
through his many stooges still in school. Since he proposed to me in the
presence of the VC, I was a tagged person and I couldn’t have even female
friends without scrutiny.
Well, after some time, we got married after my NYSC and the
feeling just got worse. My husband is someone that travels a lot so he never
really gives me or his immediate family ample time. I understand because he
provides everything for his family and I am grateful for that but a lady wants
more than that. After our first child, he became even more withdrawn and it
looks more like he just kept me there as an asset to his many laurels. He decides
when to have sex with me, when to kiss me, when to call me, when to do anything
that a couple should naturally plan together. I told him I would love to work
since I am graduate but all he simply did was increase my monthly allowance to
a ridiculously high amount of money.
During one of his many usual travelling, I met an old friend
from school who had tried hard to date me but couldn’t because of my tag back
then in school and he wasn’t married still. We exchanged contacts and despite
the fact that I told myself that our relationship would remain platonic, he was
too fantastic with the compliments that I was swept off my feet.
Before we knew
it, we were having a sizzling romantic affair that I couldn’t have enough of
him. It got to a point that even when my husband was around I would be praying
that he travels soon. Emeka (not real name) gave me sex in a way that I never
experienced before, not even close to what my husband could offer and I got
pregnant. My husband was due to come back same week that I took in so I couldn’t
go to the hospital or use any kind of funny drug. I also wanted to leave the
pregnancy as a means to slight him because of the way my husband treats me.
The
child I had from that illicit affair clocked 2 years yesterday and my husband,
who has since changed after he claimed to be a changed man, took time out to
celebrate the child more than his own original child. I felt the pang of guilt
when I saw how he’s treating the child and I don’t even know what to do now. Should
I just act like all is well or tell him the truth? What if finds out in the
future that the child isn’t his? What if he knows already since he is very good
at spy stuffs and he’s just acting as if all is well? My heart is torn between
what my heart is telling me to do and what my head wants me to do.
Please advise me.
NB
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