People want to be loved and respected by others but lack the
skills to do so. Below are stuffs you can do to increase your likeability
amongst peers, work colleagues and family.
1. Don't
judge
No one likes being judged, but it can often be
difficult to avoid judging the actions of the people we work with or who work
for us. And as much as we may try to disguise our judgment, our physical
responses can be pretty transparent. Well-liked people know this, and instead
of trying to hide it they make the conscious choice to not judge others. If
they are managers or supervisors, they make rational decisions about people
based on data and results, not emotional reactions to personalities. In
addition, they have accepted the fact that they can't, and shouldn't, try to
control or to change the lives or opinions of others.
2. Get personal
Well-liked people have mastered the delicate
dance of getting personal without getting too personal, especially in a work
environment. They break down walls by getting real--telling you about their
issues and problems but without dwelling on them. They also tell you about the
good things happening in their lives, without bragging or trying to "look
good." Their genuine willingness to be vulnerable and to take things to a
personal level naturally attracts people to them.
3. Ask
people about themselves
Rather
than spending an entire conversation talking about themselves, well-liked
people instead put the focus on the people they're with. If you don't bother to
ask questions about the person you're with, or give the person a chance to talk
about him- or herself, you'll put the person off by clearly demonstrating that
you care more about making yourself look good than actually getting to know the
other person. Well-liked people know that people enjoy talking about
themselves, and they ask questions to prompt them to do just that--building
stronger relationships and their own likeability.
4. Listen
There's
no point in asking questions if you aren’t going to listen. Active
listening--where you respond to what people are saying with timely verbal and
nonverbal prompts, conversation reinforcements, and questions--is a skill that
well-liked people have mastered. And they make a point of not looking at their
smartphones or computer screens while they're talking to someone else. This
makes the other person feel important, which builds your likeability.
5. Remember
Of
course, to remember, you must first be a good listener. Think about a time when
your boss remembered something important in your life--a child’s graduation, or
your upcoming birthday or wedding anniversary. Likeable people remember things
about those they work with, and they make sure they let those people know that
they remember. Listening and remembering shows that you value your
conversations and time spent with other people, which in turn leads them to
value their time spent with you.
6. Don't
take yourself too seriously
At
appropriate times, likeable people joke, laugh, and are just plain fun to be
around. Who doesn't want to be around someone who can share a good laugh? They
have unorthodox business meetings, and they like to surprise the people they
work with. You'll meet at the office one day and at the baseball field the
next. These people know the importance of lighthearted fun on the job, and they
try to incorporate it into their daily life, at work and at home.
7. Be
hospitable
Likeable
people know the meaning of hospitality, and they aren't afraid to invite you
into their office or even their home for a meal, a meeting, or a cup of coffee.
Opening up your office to someone is an act that never goes unnoticed, and
opening up your home to someone is like opening your heart to that person.
If
you aren't already doing these things in your business life, try taking on a
few, and watch how quickly the people around you respond. You might be
surprised at just how likeable you can be with just a few changes in the way
you treat others.
Culled
from yahoo.com
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